Valentine

So last night with my mum – the resourceful, lively, fun.....but let’s face it scary Grandma Ellie, babysitting the kids; I went on a valentines double date with my lovely yet quirky partner (heart shaped hand warmer – gel, click, heat – boil to refresh! - For my happy valentines from him... what? You might ask no flowers, underwear, perfume?) my brother and his wife.

(This is partly because my mum believes completely in equality between her children; she could not babysit for me on valentine’s night without babysitting for my brother on valentine’s night, so she had all four grand kids at my house.)

We dashed off to our local curry house ‘Asian Fusion’ – grand name but really not much fusion cooking going on there. Fabulous food and to make the evening special heart shaped helium balloons on the ceiling, (our poor waiter nearly strangled himself at one point from the bobbing string) and complimentary fake Baileys at the end of the meal to complete the ‘special occasion’ mood!

The children roused up by Grandma Ellie to star in the show, ‘Chorlton’s Got Talent’ in my front room had a fantastic time. My wonderfully talented niece sang, ‘Aint No Mountain High Enough’ the judges clapped, put her through to the next round and suppressed show biz tears! Then my handsome and talented nephew did some street dance – robotics...... the judges went wild! put him through to the next round and cheered and cheered! Next up my five year old....

 ‘And what are you going to do for us today’ Amanda Holden asked,

‘Tap dance!’ he said.

And apparently so he did but only one foot at a time.....

‘Well’ said the judges ‘We’ve never seen anything like that before...You’re through to the next round!’

Next up and the star of the show my two year old......

With a daring interpretive dance consisting mainly of jumping and rolling, ‘over the wilky’ style!

The crowd went wild!!!  It was worth the battle to stay up! The tears at the top of the stairs, the shouting ‘let me out!’ from behind the stair gate! All worth it for his moment of glory in front of his audience.

Finally they all went to bed or nodded off on the sofa.

And they all stayed in bed all night long! Hurrah!

The next morning in a six thirty daze the five year old crawled in to our bed, sleepy eyed and snuggled in. Moments later he sat bolt upright, doziness gone,

‘What’s that smell?’ he whined.

‘Smell?’

He began dry heaving and rushed to the window....

‘What’s that smell?......nappies?’

But no the toddler was still snoring in his own little bed.

The crying boy, whined and moaned and yelped his way though his disgust and the most revolting stench in our bedroom!

Finally we realised the smell was me and my partner, both stinky fish tikka karahi breath and Granny’s chilli spiced chicken....... Yuk!

For once I smell the same yucky stench as my partner; I’m not repulsed by the chilli, garlic, asafoetida smell because it’s on my breath and seeping through my pores too!

And they say romance is dead?!